Friendship is a tricky thing...

I have tried to write this same blog a couple of times but I seem to get stuck each and every time.

I love making friends, Seriously. I'm not sure if this makes me fake or not, but I'm a creature of habitat. When I work at a particular place, I tend to make lots of friends there. When I leave, I put in a bit of an effort and when it's not reciprocated I drop it. My theory? Life is too short to try and make a relationship with people who don't want to make that same effort with you. Am I wrong in that thinking? Of course there are always exceptions. I maintain some friendships from high school, elementary, etc. Hell, I haven't seen my best friend in 5 years and she is still my number 1. I may not talk to her all the time but I think of her all the time and I still tell her news before I tell any other friend. She is my prime example of the BEST friend. We don't always agree. Actually, I think we rarely agree, but we are always supporting each other to be our best. To you, thank you. I love you. I miss you. Please visit me. I have malls within 15 minutes from my house and I will cook for you.

Then, there are the other kinds of friends. They're what I call the "convenient friend". I've had lots of these. These are the people who only talk to you when it's convenient to them.

Recently I had a friend and we were pretty close. I had always felt like our friendship was one sided though. When I would be nice to her I never heard a simple "thank you", it was more like she expected it. I kept on telling myself I would just stop talking to her but then she'd be SO nice to me and I was sucked back in. It was like we were playing a game. I'd feel unappreciated after doing something nice, she'd be nice to me, she'd be mean to me, I would wonder what I did wrong, and then we'd start all over again. It was a constant cycle. When I left my last job she and I tried to continue our friendship. Again, I felt like a lot of the effort was coming from my end. Whenever we talked it was always about her issues. Now, I have no problem for being there to listen to a friend but I was going through a lot at the time and I wanted her to listen/help me too, she never did. Even through all of that, I continued to try. It wasn't until she started making unnecessarily rude comments about me being married in our group texts. I was getting private texts from the other girls asking me what was going on and if we were in a fight (again). Once I realized that I couldn't be dragged down by that friendship and I left it alone I was much happier. My experiences with this girl does NOT mean that she isn't a good friend. I know plenty of people she is very loyal to, I just don't think we were truly meant to be friends. We were both victims of our location.

In the end, that friendship taught me that I never want anyone to walk all over me again. I gave up on my inner bitch a long time ago but she has been revived. I'm not going to walk around raining on everyone's parade but I'll be more hesitant to let people push me around. I've gone back to the old me for the past 6 months and it's going pretty well ;)

Moral of the story, kids: No one should make you feel like you're not good enough to be their friend just because they're bipolar!


Until next time, make it rain.
D

I think some people have totally lost their marbles....

Okay, I work in a restaurant. Technically, two. I do social media marketing among other things. My actual title is "Reservation and Social Media Specialist". Sounds fancy, right? I'm basically just a sales and marketing assistant mixed with a secretary. Now that we have established what I do, I want to talk to you about the stupidity I have seen so far today. During the afternoon, I manage phones for both restaurants until someone else gets in at the other one. Already this morning, I have answered the phones more than I typically do in an entire two days.

Charlotte does this really cool thing twice a year called Queen's Feast Restaurant Week. Basically what it is is you get to try all these restaurants that participate in this event, a lot of fine dining restaurants will do this and you kind of get to see how the other half lives. Most restaurants offer 3 courses for $30 per person but if the restaurant has a lower price point they will offer either 4 courses or 5 courses for $30 per person, it's a really great deal! Here's the thing, good luck getting a reservation the week that it starts. You have to either put in a reservation way before restaurant week starts or be REALLY flexible with your time.

Today, at both restaurants, I have been dealing with people trying to make reservations. I can understand trying to make a reservation for 2 people, but I'm also getting people trying to make a big group reservations (think 5-12 people). I do what I can but at one location I can't take a single other reservation. We are maxed out. People are actually getting mad at me. Are you kidding me? I really want to chastise them and say "If you were a responsible adult who made plans in advance, maybe we wouldn't have this problem. This is not my fault, it's yours. You big idiot." but I don't. I smile into the phone, apologize profusely, explain that reservation times are very hard to come by during restaurant week, and ask if they'd like me to try to make a reservation for them at a later date.

I swear, I'll probably go to hell with how much I pretend to be nice. It's kind of hilarious, I'm great at customer service and attempting to diffuse difficult situation but I absolutely hate 89% of people. Did I also mention that my home restaurant (aka my home base) is extremely understaffed because of people quitting and that means I get to hostess tonight? Yup.

So yeah, THAT'S what I'm dealing with today. Wish me luck, I'll try not to kill people.

Until next time, make it rain.
D

100 Questions That No One Asks

I know this isn't my typical thing but I'm bored. At work. And I decided I wanted to do this tag I saw going around YouTube but obviously I didn't want to film it. I mean, Hello! I'm kind of shy. No need to flash my mug around the interwebs (or YouTube. Whatever) So, here we goooooo!

Q U E S T I O N S-

1:Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?

-My closet is in my bathroom and has no doors, so...

2:Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?

-I'll take it and save it for my guest bathroom, rarely do I ever us that stuff. My hair does NOT like it. 

3:Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?

-Tucked in. I'm basically a burrito when I sleep.

4:Have you ever stolen a street sign before?

-No, I'm too short to do it myself. lol

5:Do you like to use post-it notes?

-I do! But the only ones we have at work are SUPER tiny and I hate them.

6:Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?

-YES! I really should start using them.

7:Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?

-A big bear. Hands down.

8:Do you have freckles?

-I do!

9:Do you always smile for pictures?

-No. I'm a fan of a funny face.

10:What is your biggest pet peeve?

-When people invade my person space. CAN NOT STAND THAT.

11:Do you ever count your steps when you walk?

-No. 

12:Have you ever peed in the woods?

-When camping!

13:What about pooped in the woods?

-Nopppe.

14:Do you ever dance even if theres no music playing?

-Guilty as charged.

15:Do you chew your pens and pencils?

-Gross. No.

16:How many people have you slept with this week?

-Just one. My silly husband.

17:What size is your bed?

-A queen, I think.

18:What is your Song of the week?

-Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran. Actually, all of his album.

19:Is it okay for guys to wear pink?

-Wear whatever color you want, honeyyy.

20:Do you still watch cartoons?

-Rarely.

21:Whats your least favorite movie?

-I have WAAY too many to choose from. Probably something my husband loves. 

22:Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?

-Some place no one would find it, duh.

23:What do you drink with dinner?

-Usually water. Maybe soda, but that's rare.

24:What do you dip a chicken nugget in?

-Ranch, all day every day.

25:What is your favorite food?

-Italian food. I just really love food.

26:What movies could you watch over and over and still love?

-Pride & Prejudice or Ever After.

27:Last person you kissed/kissed you?

-My husband.

28:Were you ever a boy/girl scout?

-I did crafting classes with the girl scouts, if that counts.

29:Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?

-Probably not.

30:When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?

-YEARS ago when my friend was in basic training!

31:Can you change the oil on a car?

-Maybe if I had some help.

32:Ever gotten a speeding ticket?

-Nope. Knock on wood.

33:Ever ran out of gas?

-YES! I was borrowing my friend's car to take her sister to school and on the way home I ran out of gas. I didn't have anything with me so I had to run all the way back!

34:Favorite kind of sandwich?

-Cold sandwich? Turkey BLT. Hot sandwich? French dip.

35:Best thing to eat for breakfast?

-Omelette with spinach, tomatoes, avocado, and cheese.

36:What is your usual bedtime?

-It varies, usually 11-12 though.

37:Are you lazy?

-On my days off, YES.

38:When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?

-Everything! My mom didn't really care and I could usually be whatever I wanted to be.

39:What is your Chinese astrological sign?

-I don't know, I think it's the serpent.

40:How many languages can you speak?

-1 fluently.

41:Do you have any magazine subscriptions?

-Not right now. But usually it's Cosmo.

42:Which are better legos or lincoln logs?

-Legos!

43:Are you stubborn?

-Unfortunately, yes.

44:Who is better...Leno or Letterman?

-Jimmy Kimmel.

45:Ever watch soap operas?

-No.

46:Are you afraid of heights?

-Yes!

47:Do you sing in the car?

-I'm freaking Beyonce in the car.

48:Do you sing in the shower?

-Not usually.

49:Do you dance in the car?

-My hand moves are untouchable.

50:Ever used a gun?

-A water gun.

51:Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?

-For family photos last April?

52:Do you think musicals are cheesy?

-No, I love them!

53:Is Christmas stressful?

-YES!

54:Ever eat a pierogi?

-Erm. No?

55:Favorite type of fruit pie?

-Dutch Apple.

56:Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

-Singer, dancer, actress, and English teacher.

57:Do you believe in ghosts?

-Nope.

58:Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

-Yes!

59:Take a vitamin daily?

-I should, but I don't.

60:Wear slippers?

-I'm Asian, duh.

61:Wear a bath robe?

-Yes! It's so comfy!

62:What do you wear to bed?

-A t-shirt or tank top and panties.

63:First concert?

-Incubus.

64:Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?

-Target.

65:Nike or Adidas?

-Nike.

66:Cheetos Or Fritos?

-Cheetos.

67:Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?

-Sunflower seeds.

68:Ever hear of the group Tres Bien?

-Nope!

69:Ever take dance lessons?

-Yes, multiple ones.

70:Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?

-A sports announcer?

71:Can you curl your tongue?

-Kind of?

72:Ever won a spelling bee?

-Never!

73:Have you ever cried because you were so happy?

-Yes, what a lame-o.

74:Own any record albums?

-Nope.

75:Own a record player?

-Nope!

76:Regularly burn incense?

-Not anymore.

77:Ever been in love?

-Yes!

78:Who would you like to see in concert?

-Taylor Swift!

79:What was the last concert you saw?

-Jesse McCartney.

80:Hot tea or cold tea?

-Usually cold.

81:Tea or coffee?

-Both.

82:Sugar or snickerdoodles?

-Snickerdoodles.

83:Can you swim well?

-I'm okay.

84:Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?

-Yes.

85:Are you patient?

-Not at all.

86:DJ or band, at a wedding?

-DJ.

87:Ever won a contest?

-Not really.

88:Ever have plastic surgery?

-I've never done it, but I don't see anything wrong with it.

89:Which are better black or green olives?

-Black!

90:Can you knit or crochet?

-I can't. :(

91:Best room for a fireplace?

-Bedroom. How awesome would that be?

92:Do you want to get married?

-I am married!

93:If married, how long have you been married?

-One year and almost 6 months.

94:Who was your HS crush?

-I had SO many.

95:Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?

-I used to, when I was a child.

96:Do you have kids?

-I have a puppy child. 

97:Do you want kids?

-Maybe, who knows.

98:Whats your favorite color?

-Green.

99:Do you miss anyone right now?

-My Lola. Always.

100. Something that happened to you in middle school.

-On my first day of middle school, I walked into the boy's bathroom on accident.

Thanks for reading this nonsense. 

Until next time, make it rain.

D.

Letters to Destinee.

The other night I was watching Letters to Juliet on ABC Family. If you don't know the movie, it's darling. Not necessarily the best writing or acting but still adorable. Now the main story line is about this girl named Sophie who goes to Verona (with her fiance but he's never there and he's kind of immaterial to me, TBH) and as she's sightseeing she comes across Juliet Capulet's house. She's intrigued by seeing all of these girls crying while writing letters and then tacking them onto the wall of Juliet's house. So, she's sitting there watching these girls until there's no one left (creepy, but she's a writer. Maybe that makes more sense, lol.) and sees this woman take the notes down, put them in a basket, and walk away. So she follows and then questions the woman why she has taken the letters. The woman belongs to this "group" called the Secretaries of Juliet and they respond to all of the letters as Juliet and sends them back to the people who leave their return address. Intrigued, Sophie comes back the next day and helps them out. She finds this letter wedged behind a rock in the wall and tells the ladies she needs to respond, even if 50 years has passed.

The letter reads:

"I didn't go to him, Juliet. I didn't go to Lorenzo. His eyes were so full of trust I promised I'd meet him and run away together because my parents don't approve. But, instead, I left him waiting for me below our tree - waiting and wondering where I was. I'm in Verona now. I return to London in the morning and I am so afraid. Please, Juliet tell me what I should do. My heart is breaking and I have no one else to turn to. 

Love, Claire"

This is what I want to talk about. Claire was 15 when she met Lorenzo and she KNEW he was the one for her. What would you have done? Would you have gone to him? I'd like to think that I would and I wouldn't have regretted it but in all honesty, when I was 15 I definitely had no idea what love was. I knew what I thought it was but it's not like I could have defined it for you. Another thing, I would have wanted to finish school. Hello, there was no way I'd 15 with no education what so ever. But maybe, if I knew that this was the person I'd be with forever, maybe I'd run away. Or maybe I would have just told him to cool his jets and wait for me to graduate high school. I'll never know.

So, this leads me to the troubling question 'how do you know you're in love?" Um, okay. I Googled that just to see what popped up. It seems, that you just KNOW. Plenty of people seem to agree that you get "butterflies" and your heart will "smile" when seeing them. How can a heart smile? That's not even poss--never mind. I can't. Basically, the reasons were crap. TOTAL CRAP. I complied a list of sorts that I think fits perfectly.

How to REALLY Tell if You're in Love

1. You'll give them your fries. (In my opinion, love is measured by the amount of potatoes they're willing to give to you.)

2. When you play a game you will let them win without letting them know you just gave up.

3. You will laugh at all of their jokes. Even the corny ones.

4. You will NOT judge them on their love for irrelevant things such as Victoria's Secret models.

5. If they are willing to feed you, keep them.

6. They will let you decorate however you want. That includes that giant door cover that says "the princess is sleeping".

7. You will let them drive your car, even if they have only had their license a month and have gotten into 14 accidents already.

8. You will give them their coupon for something free, especially if it's something as awesome as a banana split.

9. You are willing to let them play video games and only interrupt them once.

10. You will leave the room to fart so you don't pollute their air.

If you couldn't tell, that list is purely for amusement. It made me giggle, maybe it'll do the same for you. Love isn't something that can really be defined in words, just actions. That word is thrown around too often these days to hold meaning itself, so it's the actions that will put something behind it. You know what they say, actions speak louder than words. Now, I'm going to leave you will the letter that was written in response to Claire's letter to Juliet. It really does hold meaning, and I hope you learn from it. Seize love and never, ever, be too scared to follow your heart.

"Dear Claire, 

"What" and "If" are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life: What if? What if? What if? I don't know how your story ended but if what you felt then was true love, then it's never too late. If it was true then, why wouldn't it be true now? You need only the courage to follow your heart. I don't know what a love like Juliet's feels like - love to leave loved ones for, love to cross oceans for but I'd like to believe if I ever were to feel it, that I will have the courage to seize it. And, Claire, if you didn't, I hope one day that you will. 

All my love, Juliet"

Until next time, make it rain.
D

Great Expectations

"I want to make sure the first person you kiss loves you, okay?"

-Stephen Chbosky 

Perks of Being a Wallflower

Let's get personal. I want to talk about your first kiss. How old were you? Did it live up to your expectations? Were you nervous? I want to know it all! I know, I'm nosy. Obviously you all know I'm a girl, that already is a con for my first kiss. I'm pretty sure that all girls grow up thinking that their first kiss is going to be amazing. Add to that the fact that I was (and still am) an avid reader and you're screwed. Not only did I think my first kiss would cause fireworks to randomly explode in the night sky behind me but I thought that mountains were going to come crumbling down. I thought everything would turn out like my books, movies, and my vivid imagination. It did not. I was too dumb to factor in anything else, especially nerves.

If you don't know me then you're lucky. I'm a naturally nervous person. I try to hide it but it's just always there. Let me explain. On Friday I went bowling with my fiance and only agreed to do so because it was just us two. I didn't even think about the fact that the bowling alley is a public place. Well, it was packed. PACKED. As we waited for our lane I started to shake a little. We were wedged in between a group of 6 or 7 guys and little kids on the other side. I was petrified. The entire time I was trembling and frustrated that I was doing so badly. Seriously, I got a 38 in my first game. It was horrible. Now that you know the extent of my nerves just know that it was even worse when I was in high school. I was 14 (almost 15!), which is quite young for a first kiss to some people but I was the only one of my friends that had never kissed a guy. They said it was awesome, magical, blah blah blah. This all just made me more nervous. Would it be like the books? Would I just KNOW what to do?

My first kiss was beyond embarrassing Never in my life did I think I would give up my precious first kiss during a game of truth or dare. I also didn't think that the people would gang up on me like that. I was at a Super Bowl party with a big group of people and we had played the game "never have I ever" (you know, you hold up 10 fingers and say stuff like "never have I ever worn glasses.." and if you have you put down a finger and so on.) Well, I kept on winning because I would bust out the big guns and say 'never have I ever kissed someone". Apparently they were so sick of me winning they kind of came up with a plan. Skipping the rest of the nonsense and getting to the kiss. I was sitting there with my breathing getting shallow and trembling. I was so nervous. I just kept on looking at people and asking "Can we not do this?" they just laughed and told me I had to because I was dared. I swear, I sat there for almost 20 minutes trying to work up the courage and calm my nerves. Finally, we kissed! My first kiss! Yes!

Cue the music.

Not really. It wasn't anything to write home about. You'd think that we were dared to French kiss or something by the way I freaked out but it was simply a peck on the lips. Don't get me wrong, the guy is great and actually ended up being one of my friends in high school, but I just didn't feel sparks. Looking back now, I'm almost glad it happened the way it did. My expectations were so high that I'm pretty positive that no one would have lived up to it. I don't think I could have taken it if someone I was romantically interested in failed to make sparks fly for me. Following this suit, my first kiss with an actual boyfriend wasn't anything special either. I was positive that I had idolized all these guys in books that don't exist in real life. Now I know it isn't about finding the right moment or getting rid of nerves, it's about kissing the right person. The right person can give you the sparks you want and make it feel like mountains are moving. To this day, only one person has made me feel that way.

I know that this is different for guys. From the ones I talked to it seems like they didn't expect much, they were just nervous about doing it right. For that, I'm sorry. You didn't get to dream about someone sweeping you off of your feet and blowing you away with their kiss. I'm even more sorry that you have to be the one the pressure for the kiss falls on. It has to be someone, and I'm so glad it's not me.

"The first kiss I had was the most disgusting thing in my life. The girl injected about a pound of saliva into my mouth, and when I walked away I had to spit it all out." -Leonardo DiCaprio

Thanks for that visual, Leo.

Until next time, make it rain.
D

Reality Bites

What is our obsession with celebrities? Why do we actually care what's going on in their lives? These are the questions I think about when I see what people write to celebrities via social media. All I see is hate, hate, hate. I don't care if you hate a celebrity, I'm sure I do too. But why is it necessary to spread that hate around and "bully" these people. Do you really think they read ALL of the messages, comments, etc.? I'm pretty sure they don't. They get so many in a matter of minutes, it seems impossible. I'm bringing this up only because of the Grammy's last night. One Directioners are in an uproar over the British accent Taylor Swift did during her performance. I can't help but laugh. Really? Did she hurt YOU personally? No. I'm pretty sure she didn't. I'm tolerable of all fans but it seems like these One Directioners are the worst. And I mean the WORST. My heart goes out to them because I can relate to the fact that they "love" these people. I mean, who am I to judge? I was supposed to be married and have 3 kids with Nick Carter or Justin Timberlake by now but, alas, that has not happened. Obviously. In all seriousness though, why are we acting like what these celebrities do affect our lives? They don't. They don't even know we, as individuals, exist.

Don't even get me started on the "Beliebers". Just don't. They're fucking nuts for cutting themselves. That's it.

Another thing we're obsessed with--getting mad at celebrities because they have things we don't. Sure, you don't think Kim Kardashian has talent. That's fine. But to say she doesn't earn it is stretching. I'll agree that she doesn't really seem to have much talent and I personally like Khloe because she seems the most real. Honestly, none of them really have talent (with the exception of Kendall and Kylie who are models. Whether that takes talent is debatable). They have made a career out of reality TV and it has given them opportunities. The fact that they have made themselves into a "brand" is what they do. It takes some sort of business savvy to do that. So what if they were born into money? They've made whatever they had ten times over by seizing opportunities and taking advantage of them. You can't really hate for that because you know if that was you you'd do the same damn thing. Plus, it's obvious Kim didn't really have as much money as before. Remember her walking around with that hideous make-up and sloppy body? Money might not be able to buy you happiness but it can buy you a make-up artist and a personal trainer. Furthermore, money doesn't mean that you get what you want and that your life is perfect. Most celebrities can't even stay in a relationship or marriage for very long because of the troubles they deal with. Whether it be fame or money, just be happy you don't have to deal with it.

I'll probably get some hate for this post but who cares? I don't know you and if you're offended by this little blog post of mine, I probably don't want to know you.

Until next time, make it rain.

D

Heads up!

I'm transferring some of my favorite blog posts from an old blog of mine so you'll be seeing about 2-3 new posts today but they were all written over 2 years ago!


Until next time, make it rain.
D